I laid in bed, my heart and head heavy with all that had transpired that day. It was a pretty average day; cleaning, cooking, homeschooling and parenting took up the majority of the time. But, as I laid my head down I was wondering, did I do enough?
You see, I was struggling with perfectionism and some seriously strong mom guilt. The kind that only comes from the devil himself. My home never felt clean enough. My children never felt obedient enough. My homeschool never felt creative enough. And I sure didn’t have the time I wanted to craft and be with my children. To ice the cake, one scroll on social media or Pinterest would dash any ideas I had that I did a decent job at something that day. Everyone ELSE was so put together and perfect…everyone but me. And my need for perfection kept me paralyzed, never attempting anything different.
Let me know if you’ve ever felt any of the following:
- My kids don’t sit still for devotional time, so why bother trying?
- My craft with the kids will never look like *insert social media influencers name here*, I can’t do this!
- All I do is cook and clean, I have no time to spend with the kids and they are growing up before my eyes – and without me!
I’ve felt all these things, and more. Comparison kept me trapped for a good couple years of my motherhood. But then God….
If you haven’t checked out my post, “What are Tabernacle Tikes” head over there now, but I’ll also give you a quick rundown.
One day, God tapped my on my shoulder. He told me to stop chasing after the motherhood the world feeds us and instead, lean into Him. See, mama, he made you for such a time as this – for such children that he gifted you with! He created you skilled and just asks for your willingness to walk out in faith during our seasons of motherhood. And this year, we are going to attempt to build that tabernacle in our tiny humans’ hearts, one intentional moment that matters at a time.
See, the tabernacle wasn’t built as one giant piece. It was tiny, little moments. A dyed cloth here. A flower crafted for a lamp stand there. Little tiny tasks that created God’s holy dwelling place. And our motherhood is no different. It isn’t about the grand Pinterest movie night with individual tee-pees and personalized popcorn buckets (although I would love to accomplish these feats). No, our motherhood is about taking the time to stop the dishes and get down on your tiny humans level to offer guidance and love when they have been fighting with a sibling. It’s fostering a home where it’s okay to fail because mom and dad are here to offer you grace and mercy, just as our Daddy God does for us. It’s about carving out the time to read, play, cook or craft with your kiddos. Because relationship is vital for bringing them to faith.
So how do we do this? Here are some simple steps to start right now. But throughout the year we will be working together to build relationship and faith – this is just the beginning!
Throw perfectionism in the trash can.
We will never be perfect on this side of heaven, and although I’m sure eternity with Jesus is better than I can ever imagine, I’m totally wanting to stay here for now. So, lets let go of that pesky beast of perfection.
Embrace the chaos and laugh through it.
Life with littles is crazy. All the time. And we can get worked up over things that we feel like are bumping our happy pretty easily. Some things, however, just have to be let go at this time. Real life example? My 3 year old constantly leaves the door open when she goes outside to play. I noticed a habit of me going a little bonkers with the 3,405,596 times I had to remind her to close the door. Then, I decided to embrace it instead. I started telling her “You weren’t raised in a barn, close the door” and Mooing afterwards. It made everyone giggle and the door was closed. Now? I literally say nothing and just moo. It creates joy, laughter and keeps me sane!
Be okay with YOUR mistakes and model how to apologize afterwards.
The best thing we can do for our children is learn to apologize. We all struggle with our flesh (see perfectionism point above – we aren’t dead so we aren’t perfect) and through that flesh we can make mistakes. Anyone yell – like angry mean yell – at their kids? If not, this space may not be for you. HA! Although I don’t do it often, there are definitely times where I have had ENOUGH and the momster comes out to play. Honestly? Sometimes I think it’s good for our kids to see us loose it. But when mommy has taken her own time out, it’s time to sit down for a heart to heart and apologize. This shows them not only the model of how to behave themselves, but also introduces them to God’s grace and mercy!
Allow interruptions to be divine moments
Sometimes I forget that my children are not interruptions and instead they are the most important work. Even if that means that pile of laundry goes unfolded. When your kids are having a problem, STOP what you are doing and go to them, working out the issues with scripture and focus. If a little one runs inside all excited for you to come see something, don’t worry, that dust pile you were sweeping will still be there when you finish showing them that they are your priority. There is always a time to say ‘not right now’ but those moments should never outnumber the moments we stop to give them our full attention.
Intentionally build FAITH and RELATIONSHIP
So, where are we going with this one? Well, that’s what this year is all about! Together our Tabernacle Tikes Tribe is going to focus on a virtue or character trait a month to work on intentionally fostering relationship within our family members as well as a foundation of faith. These two things go together, you see. Without a firm relationship, our tikes will grow up to question and doubt the faith. But when linked together, we will cultivate home atmospheres that create the tabernacle in our children’s hearts!
I know this may be a lot to digest, but don’t worry – we will be walking through this every step of the way – TOGETHER! Come join our community of like minded mommas on Instagram and begin a year of cultivating the moments that matter!